By In my lifetime, I have created exactly one awesome password. It’s 24 characters long, includes letters and numbers, and is a memorable sentence that no rational person, with the exception of myself, would ever know. Every other password I’ve created—and occasionally still use—is crap.
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I use this awesome password with my LastPass account, which actually handles all of my password creation and management. It generally spits out shorter passwords full of letters and numbers, but they’re created in such a way that they’re neither guessable nor memorable. LastPass, by the way, is the free, online, award-winning password manager I’ve been using for almost two years. I don’t know what I’d do without it, but I now know what many other people do when they don’t use password creation and management products, such as LastPass, RoboForm or perhaps Norton Internet Security: They create some of the worst and most embarrassing passwords known to man.
I asked my Twitter followers to reveal their worst and most embarrassing passwords (though not ones they currently use) and got back some whoppers. I suspect that a few of these are the same as your embarrassing digital code words. My hope is that this list will entertain (some are chuckle-worthy) and educate you (now you have proof that your own passwords are ridiculous). I swear folks, these are real.
Before we get to the list, though, if you insist on creating your own passwords, here are some rules to live by:
* Use at least six characters
* Mix letters and numbers
* Other characters, like underscores, work, too
* Use uppercase and lowercase letters
* A sentence is great as long as it’s not a famous quote
* Do not use the same password in multiple places
With that out of the way, let’s look at some of your worst and most embarrassing passwords.
1) password
As you might guess, this is one of two password selections that showed up more than once. If you’re still using it, you might as well print out all your personal documents, financial records, and photos, tape them to a minivan, and drive it around the neighborhood.
2) 12345
This guy is popular on computers and, apparently, luggage. It’s no easier to remember a physical lock combo than it is a digital one, so many people who buy briefcases with locks and either never set them and pull the red tab (that would be me) or make sure that the combo is the most obvious in existence.
3) CaseSensitive
This one wouldn’t be so terrible if it weren’t so painfully obvious.
4) Teletubbie
Having trouble writing this because I…am…laughing…so…hard. Parents of young children can be partially excused for using this embarrassment, but next time, I suggest something with a bit more edge like: DoraTheImpaler.
5) F*ckOffPlease
One Twitter follower told me that every one of his passwords at his old job was a profanity or a phrase featuring a profanity. Clearly, the guy had some issues at work. Here’s hoping he’s now at a new job where the spiciest password he uses is EveryoneHereIsSoNice.
6) hellogod
This one isn’t so bad, but if someone gets a hold of this one, you may be pegged as a religious zealot.
7) homeboyee
This one might be a little embarassing when you have that conversation with your IT administrator. You’ll say it, the admin will likely snicker (and assume he heard you wrong), you’ll spell it out, and then you’ll get that look.
8) <3BSB<3
This is actually a good password (look at those characters!), but completely embarrassing subject matter. Its author revealed that she was very into the Backstreet Boys when she came up with it. I wonder if her new password is NKOTB.
9) goldeneye
Nerds and geeks have a habit of using their favorite characters and/or movie and book titles in their passwords. This one isn’t too nerdy, but if anyone knows you’re a fan of James Bond, your goose is cooked. As an aside, all Star Wars fans should steer clear of Jedi, Luke, and Darth.
10) OpenUp
This is easily one of the worst passwords ever. In fact, I doubt any real thought went into it.
11) asdfhgjkl
This one is a classic. At first, it looks pretty good and you might think, “Look, it’s just random letters. Who would ever figure that one out?” However, those letters look kind of familiar, don’t they? Take a good look at your keyboard. That’s right, it’s all the letters in the third row, from “a” to “l.”
12) gotohell40
No one likes turning 40 (or 50, 60 or 70), but this kind of password is only safe when you’re not 40.
Share your password missteps in the comments area below.
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